The Life We'll Never Have

Well, so I didn't post yesterday. Was really pissed about being strapped like a sick person, with a tube over my neck and down my chest. Things really sucked yesterday. And the worst part? I couldn't bathe for 24 hours. How sick is that.. Well, at least now I'm sitting here, smelling real good after a bathe, and feeling much better without tubes. Lolx.

So tonight's rehearsal and I only found out this afternoon. Man, I really should check my email more often. And I was scheduled to meet Shawn and Gina at 6pm. Guess it'll be cut real short. Oh, if you're wondering how Gina knew Shawn, it's me. Their friendship started from Shawn wanting to know more about 'Mass Comm' in TP. However, it's not called Mass Comm. For all you know Janine, you might just see Shawn sitting beside you. And Joram too. Wow.

So, wondering why I posted the title as such? Well, it is so true we'll never have the life we want. The best grades, better parents, better environment, better government etc. But little do we realise that we're already called to more than this. We're called to the need, not to the wants. Get what I mean?

My train of thought started when I was taking the cab home from CMPB, after removing the stupid tube and machine. Thank God. The cab driver then started what I may call, the best conversation I had in a cab in my life. The cab driver was the most service-oriented guy I've had in my life. He was a great person to talk to.

What a pity.

Is there something with cab drivers and the government? Man, almost every other cab driver I meet harps on and on about the way the government is running things. From transport, to wages, to supplements etc. You get the picture. Can't they talk about the something else? I mean, why government? Just strange man.

But I had a paradigm shift once he told me his story. About how he served for 15 years, with much dedication. He was with the government, and all respect was given. He loved his job, and was earning a comfortable salary.

Until last year.

One fine day, Senior Minister stepped in and told them that they would have to leave in a month and a half. Yes, compensation will be given. But to this cab driver, it was more than that. It would mean he would be out of job, and would have to worry for his son and daughter. His son is in the final year of University, and his daughter is doing her 'O's. I think he must have been crestfallen. From someone, to a deemed no one.

15 years, resulted in disappointment. Anyone would have been. And applying for a new job was so tough for him because of his age; above 45. Talk about a comfortable life. This guy had no other choice but to go for what people surmise as the last job you'll look for - a cab driver. He didn't want to, but he needed to.

So you see? We live a life that is 'need', and not 'wants'. Everyone has a dream, has a perfect picture of how they want life to be. But can we really have what we want? Our dreams, our hopes, our future. Everything comes back to square one.

Have you surrended?

Your dreams. Your past. Your present. Your future. Your sickness. Your hurts. Your emotions. Your skills. Your wants. Your talents. Your Life.

I've come to a conclusion. Life is not what you want it to be, but about whether you've learnt to give it up to someone who can control it way better than you do. Want to know who this person is? It's called God. Only He can make you feel life is worth more than what you want.

Will you agree with me?